05/07/2023

Here we go again!

Background: I have Stage 4 Metastatic Prostate Cancer that's showing up in a few of my lymph nodes and in my bones, particularly in my pelvis and right hip, which is where this round of radiation treatments will be targeting.
What I’m sharing was drawn from a recent Journal entry, as I pondered the recent diagnosis and the upcoming treatments.

The radiation is about to begin.
I'm focusing my mental & emotional energy on a favorable outcome.
As metaphysical (mystical) as it sounds, in recent days...and moving forward...I'm mediating on progress and healing.
I’m visualizing the dark spots I saw on the CT Scan dissolving through this process, which began with the new chemo meds two weeks ago.
I’ll seek to manage the pain (it's a lot!) with a view to anticipated relief as we "zap" the cancer with radiation.

Personal Note: I hope that doesn’t sound like the declarations of some charlatan “name-it-and-claim” TV preacher, or the mantras of a new-age guru.
I am neither. I’m just a guy seeking to participate in his recovery!

Fear is a factor, so I draw on the strength & comfort of my faith…as I have for more than 40 years.
I pray for wisdom for my medical team, and I remind myself of the success of these therapies.
I lean into the support of my amazing husband, my family, and my “village.”

I will listen to my body.
I will listen to my heart.
I will listen to my medical team.
I will listen to words of encouragement and support from loved ones around me.
I'll (probably) listen to my husband, who can be both Florence Nightingale and Nurse Ratched.

In many ways, I've been here before.
My first diagnosis was back in 1999.
I’ve had a few since then, so there’s a flicker of familiarity in the midst of this murky new path.

To quote the great philosopher, Stephen Sondheim, “I'm still here!”

I'm optimistic and hopeful.
I’m also determined and stubborn as hell.

Time to do this.
Again!